Feeling Sentimental

Woke at 5 a.m. this morning completely rested. Not my usual Saturday morning feeling. I was anxious to get a cup of joe and resume my latest hobby...blog questing. If as if I don't have enough hobbies right now, right? I've always been one who likes to learn about new technology. For example, I only recently discovered what blogging truly is. I honestlly thought it was something only teachers used to communicate with parents! I know ...I know...what rock have I been under...uh it's called MOTHERHOOD! Anyhow, now that my kids are getting a little older(and in school full time I might add), I have had more time to explore the possibilities of the web. To shorten this up, because I have to get to my real point of this blog post, I am in awe with which people use this blog business. I have seen the most fantastic and creative uses of it from photography, hobbies to business. Recently saw one mother take her posts to create a BLOG book. How cool is that! It has inspired me to do more posting and journaling as I'm doing today. More on my blog obsession later...I am feeling sentimental this morning because all this week, I've been turning my camera on my own boys rather than clients. I also rented a 50mm 1:4 for a week which I'm seriously considering adding to my bag and needed to practice with it. In doing so, I found myself remembering some details of my relationship with my children. I will start with Tobin, my youngest little man. We took our sweet, senior pet, Mickey, for a walk this week and held hands. Now this is something we do all the time but what hit me hard was I forgot about the LOVE SQUEEZES. This is something I've done with all my boys since they were wee tiny. When we hold hands I would squeeze their little hands and tell them that when mommy does this, this means I LOVE YOU. On our little walk, Tobin, squeezed my hand more than I can tell you. We could of kept walking all day as far as I'm concerned. Of course, my tears spilled out and our shaddow caught my eye and gave me some inspiration for the pics I am posting. Part of my weepiness has to do with him being my baby and that I know what happens when they get older, this little detail disappears for a long time. It's so sad but I can't remember the last time my 13 year old held my hand. I have a huge lump in my throat right now...my sweet Tobin... you are my little man, my sensitive boy, my beam of sunshine, my beautiful brown eye boy...stay little for just a while longer for me, K? Love you buddy XOXO, Mommy.